Anniversary gift for Troy<3
And I saw an old lady looking at cards beside me. She really liked the one I was going to get him, so I gave it to her:) That made me feel good :)) Also, I spent the evening with Troy<3 He came up to visit and I gave him his birthday present, went out to dinner and saw a movie with him<3 I got him a lava lamp, Avengers t-shirt and I painted a picture frame with our picture in it<3 It was a perfect evening with the perfect man for me<3 I love you Troy!
I also got him his birthday present, well part of it, I’m still thinking of more things to get him. Today is our 9 month anniversary<3 Happy 9 months Troy, I love yew<3
I remember spending hours in the hospital with her, holding her hand and telling her everything’s going to be okay. I couldn’t help but cry because I knew there was nothing I could do to get rid of her pain. She couldn’t respond because she had a tube down her throat, breathing for her. I remember there were a few nurses in the room painting her nails and doing her hair because she wanted to look nice when people came to see her. She’s beautiful, always has been and always will be. I remember giving her rides home from school and talking about anything. Whether that may be boys, break ups or anything else on our minds. She would spend several minutes after school working on her dance routine, looking like a pro as always. This is so hard, but I try to think of all the good times we’ve had together. I want her to know how much I love her and miss her. Jessie, I hope you have an incredible birthday, even better than the past ones you’ve had on earth. I’m sure Britney Spears will be involved in some way, shape or form. I’ve been thinking of some of our inside jokes and all of the wonderful memories we’ve had. I miss you so much and I hope you are doing well. Rest peacefully Jessie, you will forever be in my heart<3 I love you.
He drove an hour and a half just to come visit me<3 We went to Hiddnite (I think) to look for gems. The water was freezing, but we managed to find sapphires, rose quartzs and other gems! After that, we went back to my house, ate some lasagna, and played video games for two hours. We tried looking for movies, but everything was showing kind of late, so we just played video games. He left not too long ago. I hope he has a safe drive! I gave him some wild cherry pepsi to keep him up. I’m so happy he came to visit me<3 I had so much fun with him. I love being around him, I just feel stress-free. My mom told me that we could have rented a movie at redbox for a dollar… well… too late now! I love you, Troy! <3
I just got off the phone with my mom and she mentioned running into your mom. She said she wouldn’t mind hanging out with my mom. She said Christmas was hard this year which I can understand why since it was around the time when you were in the hospital to get lung transplant, plus it was their first Christmas without you. Your birthday is coming up soon and it’s going to feel strange without you being here to celebrate. I remember holding your hand when you were being rushed into the PICU room for treatment. I remember seeing you in the bed with wires, tubes and machines breathing for you. I felt like it just wasn’t fair to you and I felt so helpless. I made you a card and got teary eyed trying to read it, the nurse had to read it. I held your hand when I was sitting next to you. I remember that welcome home party you had and that cute guy we both liked was there (since you casually invited him ;D) I admire how you are so fearless about everything and anything that crosses your path. If you saw a cute guy you liked, nothing would stop you from talking to him. If someone was being a total jerk to your friends, you would stand up for them, like what you did with me during my break up. I can’t thank you enough for that. Even I didn’t have the courage to give him the stink eye when he would walk by (I know that scared the shit out of him). I’m doing well now. I have a new boyfriend that treats me with respect. I’ve pretty much erased that break up from my past and he now has nothing to do with my life. I’ve also erased others from my life, those who I considered the best of friends, but never treated me with the respect I deserved. I know you wouldn’t stand for it and neither will I. I feel like I’ve become a little more down to earth and valiant ever since this year started and I have you to thank for that. I really miss you though. I miss having you here with me to give me advice and the latest gossip. Now all I have are pretty much guy friends. There’s nothing wrong with that, but I miss having a girlfriend to talk to. All of the girlfriends I used to have are people I no longer talk to or get along with. All they care about is themselves and I can’t stand arrogant, conceited people. I just want you to know that I love you and I miss you very much. This year is going to be hard without you as it will for many years to come. I love you forever and always Jessie<3 Rest in Peace<3
And every morning he’ll be like:
And he’ll always tell me:
And at night when I’m lying in bed, he’ll ask me:
And I’ll be all like: